i'm away.

BYE

i'm so sorry baby.

for, i am always the cause of all the disputes we have, those never ending tiffs we have everytime i just had to bring up some stuffs. though we always make things up, i really don't want all this to keep on going. it's just those small things that always cracks my mind up. and somehow those small things make me think if you are ever taking things seriously. at times it really felt that you do. but at certain times i don't feel as though you are. because sometimes you don't show if i mean the world to you like how you are to me.

sat was spent over at cousin's yet again.ps3-ed slash xbox-ed.syam and din came again. but this time baby and syafheqah(my cousin) came down. and YEAH i was suppose to attend baby's family chalet but, i don't know what happened -.-. but nevermind i don't really bother aout that, cause he stayed over (: yes yes, which meant that i slept with him(: well, not literally slept slept but yeah, then cabbed down to his place and have some time together. skipped his soccer match and then head down for dinner with his bunk mates.chilled and then train-ed home. AND i still haven't got enough of him. gone case.

baby i love you.VERY MUCH.

sometimes, you wonder if, someone whom you've stood by for and been stood by for, is ever true to you. as a person who never trust anyone, i find it hard to ever trust, even if it means trusting your own bestfriend. but i want to make it an exception for aan, i want to trust him really i do. and now i wonder, you my bestfriends are you guys really living up to your status? or its just a god damn status that we surface to the public to see. i don't know. this is the reason why i'm not into socializing that much now. i prefer socializing withing the circle of friends and within their own cirle of friends just not here on the net anymore.

tiff after tiff after tiff, baby i'm tired of all the bickering. though we end up making things up, i don't want anymore bickering for now.I LOVE YOU. where are you?turn on your bloody phone!!

i miss how things were, now it feels as though we're trying so hard.why? everyday i wonder, i think, i ponder, and i wish. i wish things aren't so difficult. and it feels as though there are still some things that i ought to know that you're hiding.

and i never meant to be skeptical, but curiousity made me likewise.

nevertheless, i fucking love you. you sure do know that very well.

no one's real. the world's full of pretence. and i figured that i will have to go along with it. be a two face in front of a two face. that's how things works and then the world will be a better place. also i figured no one hold on to their promises. they'll always, i really mean ALWAYS, break their promises.

so today's like the 3rd day, in a row, i worked. which will then go on for another day then a pause then another working day on fri and sunday. i have to and got to recoup my loses for the past two months by working more the next two months, also meanwhile i'm looking for either a second job or perhaps a better paying job. on top of that, i really want to head back to school. talked to my mom about it yesterday, she's fine with it as long as i'll focus on my studies. and with that, i'm going to do some of the paying of the school fees as well. i really hope i'll be able to start school by december. ):

i miss backside so much come back quick!

till we grow saggy breast saggy dick okay baby?

suddenly i miss how you'd take care of me when i was sick, the point of time when you'd blow my nose for me and wipe off mucus from my stinking nose using your bare hands and wipe it on yourself. it really made me want to fall sick all over again. for, no one care for me like you do. i love you pantat.

goodnight.

after so long. all four of us managed to meet up, yes ALL FOUR.even though it was for awhile, at least we met. (: after which, met the boy.yes its a saturday, its only natural that it's a meet-the-boyfriend day. okay thats all. i'm tired. i'm off to bed. BYE

today like any of the past days except for yesterday, i headed down to his pad, Boon Lay. made full use of the day to spend time together as he's heading back to camp after the 4 days off from hell. :DD spend some quality time together before his mom got back home. afterwhich, we stayed on for awhile more to watch tv and have a chat with his mom. i swear his mom's so cute.(: she even shared with me about baby's funny moments like how he would sleep talk and answers/reacts to people's questions like as though he's fully awake. heehee. and! his mom invited me to their family bbq pit in two weeks time! excited like crazy,hahaha. okay i think i shall head to bed now. i need to get rid of my eyebags besides tomorrow i'm doing opening. bleargh.

and shit my skin's started to peel. fuck la.

okay bye. (:

sentosa photos:

currently over at boon lay

updates later,

BYEBYE

damn it, i've been surfing the net this past few days and i see alot of stuffs that i want.

yes, still at the top of my list would be olympus pen ep-1, and then i saw psp go system, god i fell in love with it at an instant. if only there's more colours available.since currently it's only available in white and black, i want it in BLACK! its nice right!???????????!!! ): sigh. i also want a new phone badly, i'm going bonkers using my mom's spare.help! i need new wardrobe of clothes too. new shoes. also i want to do up my room. fuck it man.

god baby where are you.! i miss you la ass.

okay bye tomorrow i've got the whole day, work, for nine hours, then off to celebrate Fiqah's belated.booze booze booze. (: i'm so going to faint at the end of the day. i'm breathless still. ): BYE

i don't want to be the girl you talk about to your boys, rather, i want to be the girl you'll think of anytime, anyday, and especially at the end of the day which then you'll call me up just to say how much you've missed me. cause it's never worthwhile being a trophy, but it would be if i mean everything in the world to you.